The Empty NestTurning the Kids’ Old Rooms Into Something That Is Ours
Three empty bedrooms sat untouched in our house for far too long. Here is how we finally turned them into rooms for the life we have…
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6 articles
The Empty Nest
When the last child leaves and the house gets quiet, a marriage gets a second chance. Here is how we used ours.
6 articles
Keeping Romance Alive
Dates, letters, affection and the small habits that keep a long marriage warm.
5 articles
Retiring Together
Two people, one house, all day long. What we learned when work stopped and life together really started.
6 articles
Making It Work
Arguments, apologies, listening and the everyday skills that keep two people on the same side.
5 articles
Hard Seasons
Illness, grief, caregiving and the stretches when love is mostly showing up.
5 articles
Family Life Now
Grandkids, adult children, in laws and holidays, without losing the marriage in the middle of it all.
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Hard SeasonsGrieving Together After Losing a Parent
When Diane's mother passed in 2022, we learned that two people can lose the same person and grieve in completely different ways. This is what helped…
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Making It Work12 Ways to Handle Annoying Habits Without Losing Your Mind
Snoring, cabinet doors left open, stories told for the fifth time. After over thirty years together we have plenty of small habits that drive each other…
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Retiring TogetherRetirement Is a Marriage Transition Nobody Prepares You For
Everyone helps you plan the money side of retirement, but almost nobody mentions what it does to a marriage. Here is what surprised us most after…
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Keeping Romance AliveWhy We Still Write Each Other Letters
In a world of quick texts, we still sit down and write each other real letters on paper. Here is why the habit has outlasted every…
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Keeping Romance AlivePlanning a Vow Renewal That Actually Means Something
A vow renewal can be a second wedding or something quieter and truer. Here is how we planned ours in the backyard, and what we would…
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A note from us
Over thirty years in, we are still figuring it out
We have been roommates more than partners for a stretch, argued about the same thing for decades, sat in a hospital waiting room and cared for a parent at the end. We are still here, still choosing each other. Everything on this site comes from that.
Read our storyMaking It Work
View allMaking It Work12 Ways to Handle Annoying Habits Without Losing Your Mind
Snoring, cabinet doors left open, stories told for the fifth time. After over thirty years together we have plenty of small habits that drive each other…
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Making It WorkHow to Apologize When You Have Both Heard It All Before
After decades together, a plain I am sorry can start to sound like background noise. Here is what we have learned about making an apology land…
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Making It Work10 Things We Stopped Doing That Made Our Marriage Better
Most marriage advice is about what to start doing. Some of the biggest improvements in our own marriage came from quietly letting go of habits that…
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View allRetiring TogetherRetirement Is a Marriage Transition Nobody Prepares You For
Everyone helps you plan the money side of retirement, but almost nobody mentions what it does to a marriage. Here is what surprised us most after…
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Retiring Together13 Ground Rules for Couples Who Are Suddenly Home All Day
When retirement puts you both under one roof all day, a few simple ground rules can keep love and patience intact. These are the ones that…
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Retiring TogetherWhy Separate Hobbies Saved Our Retirement
We spent our first retired months trying to do everything together, and it nearly drove us up the wall. Here is why giving each other separate…
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